Even muscles are bigger at Sams

A visit to the Sams Club is a regular event on our calendar. It is a great chance to stock up on fruit, frozen chicken, and paper towels. We always time our trips to Sams around the lunch hour and no visit would be complete with out a 99 cent hot dog and a free cookie from the bakery. Any place where you can purchase a month's supply of toilet paper, a 24 pack of boys Haines underwear, 4 pounds of raisins, and feed my children for two dollars is a wonderful establishment. A shopping trip to Sam's usually leaves me feeling very productive, but last weeks visit left me feeling productive, and entertained.

As we strolled down the aisles looking for a lifetime supply of Bisquick Pancake mix, I stopped dead in my tracks. As we turned the corner to start a new aisle, a stopped dead in my tracks and broke out into a cold sweat. At the end of the aisle was a very large woman shopping for her groceries on a motorized scooter. Now if you are a mother, you know exactly why this scenario would cause me to perspire like a man. I am with two preschoolers who are exceptionally observant. Not only are they observant, but are prone to voice their observations. My brain immediately began to think of all the things that might come out of their mouths as we passed an obese woman riding on a scooter. I looked to Beaux first, but she was eyeing a 48 count box of Fruit Rollups and was thankfully distracted. I then looked to Eli, but it was too late. His gaze was already fixated on our shopper. As the woman was raising her arm above her head to try and reach something above her, let's just say her tricep muscle wasn't exactly toned, and she revealed a large amount of hanging arm flab. I could see Eli's mind running a million miles an hour. And then I saw him open his mouth. It felt as if I was moving in slow motion as I moved to try and cover his lips, but it was too late.
Eli commented on his view.

"MOM. MOM. DID YOU SEE THAT. DID YOU SEE HER ARM. HER MUSCLES ARE HUGE! I THINK HER MUSCLES ARE EVEN

BIGGER THAN SUPERMANS!"

Eli's love of superheros makes him exceptionally knowledgeable about their physique. They do have very large arm muscles. However those muscles usually flex up, not hang down. This lady could have been an Olympic body builder if her arm flab hardened, and pointed up instead of hanging down. But the direction and firmness of the muscle wasn't important to Eli, only the size. I totally ignored his comment as we sprinted pass the poor woman. And as we started down the next aisle, I admit, I had a huge smile my face. The innocence and logic of his statement was just priceless. The truth is, I really wish we lived by Eli's standard of fitness. If the flab I have could just been seen as muscle- well, I might just be mistaken for Wonder Woman.